FOX NEWS SPECIAL REPORT

Same sex doughnuts linked to decline of USA morals

Global Warming blamed on doughnuts

Doughnuts thought to be cause of Global Recession

Obama vows to crack down on doughnuts.

Killer Klowns

FOX News' designated flamethrower, Bill O'Reilly, slammed Rosie on "The O'Reilly Factor" last night, calling her "nutty" and "irresponsible," and suggesting that ABC should fire O'Donnell for her provocative remarks about Iran and the war in Iraq..

..... boy that is some killer comedy, Bill!!

Frankly, speaking of Rosie, I would have added 'shrill' to nutty and irresponsible..... but O'Reilly doesn't seem to get it that he is nutty, irresponsible and asinine.

http://www.oreilly-sucks.com/

I just don't understand things these days. I am really sure that I don't want to, either.

Talking heads... hemorrhoids that speak.

And then in real news... Neda Agha Sultan.

Just google the name. I have nothing to say.

The more things change..... the more they stay the same.

Some days I just want to move to Montana

Time

Ticking away the moments that make up a dull day

Fritter and waste the hours in an offhand way

Kicking around on a piece of ground in your home town

Waiting for someone or something to show you the way

Yuppers, I gotz no time. I was out of the office for three days and I just feel like I have a lot of catching up to do. Next week I only have three days IN the office, with the July fourth holiday coming up.

Time has come today

Young hearts can go their way

Can't put it off another day

I don't care what others say

They say we don't listen anyway

Time has come today

I spent most of the weekend biking and working on my 'flip-flop' tan.

I almost feel that I might have something important to say........... I hope that feeling goes away soon.

Time flys when one is having fun.

Payday Friday

Don't know much about history

Don't know much biology

Don't know much about a science book

Don't know much about the french I took

But I do know that Sarah Palin really doesn't have boobs that look that good... or I might have voted for her.

And I know I gotz this nifty, spiffy, peachie-keen bridge that spans Lake Michigan and I really need to sell it.....

.. and I know that God, if there is one, did not rest on the seventh day

(and what is up with that anyways.... like, God would need to rest? I mean, from what? Being God? That was just one of the thingees in the Bible that didn't make sense. I mean, if the Bible said that on the seventh day God played Monopoly or ate a ham sandwich.... gees, that would make more sense than he needed to rest!)

But after that......

Don't know much about geography

Don't know much trigonometry

Don't know much about algebra

Don't know what a slide rule is for

Winter

Oh, but these are days! Finally!

I woke today with a clean crispness in the air, cool and even fragrant as it touched all my senses. There was a promise of warmth later in the day that will making reading under the shade of a steadfast maple a simple joy to look forward to.




It reminds me of mornings waking on my parents sleeping porch when I was young and the summer days would kiss your cheek and take your hand to lead you into days of infinite possiblities and promises and adventures and fun and you would know deeply that if those things
didn't happen on this day.... they certainly would on a day soon, and it would be better than anything you had ever thought about.

Those days are not like they used to be.... but they still exist, and when I find one I hope I am never so old as to not believe in them for then I will have certainly lost faith in myself.

Winter may be coming...... but it is not today.

Tails

Please excuse Kennedy from school

-- signed, Barack Obama

Associated Press
June 12, 2009
Green Bay, Wis. -- Ten-year-old Kennedy Corpus has a rock-solid excuse for missing the last day of school: a personal note to her teacher from President Obama.Her father, John Corpus of Green Bay, stood to ask Obama about healthcare during the president's town hall-style meeting at Southwest High School on Thursday. He told Obama that his daughter was missing school to attend the event and that he hoped she didn't get in trouble.

"Do you need me to write a note?" Obama asked. The crowd laughed, but the president was serious.On a piece of paper, he wrote: "To Kennedy's teacher: Please excuse Kennedy's absence. She's with me. Barack Obama."He stepped off the stage to hand-deliver the note -- to Kennedy's surprise.
"I thought he was joking until he started walking down," Kennedy said after the event, showing off the note in front of a bank of television cameras. "It was like the best thing ever."The fourth-grader at Aldo Leopold elementary in Green Bay already knew what she was going to do with the note: Frame it along with her ticket to the event. She said she'd make a copy for her teacher.Kennedy said she had never seen Obama before. "He's really nice," she said.


** OK. Maybe it's no big deal.... but here's the stuff...... About five years ago when Bush was running for re-erection he visited Oshkosh. Sorta. I mean, there was a 'set-piece' show.... and then the whole fucking motorcade 'sped' through town. Nobody really saw him, except for a few Republicans at the meeting. And some of Max's friends who happened to be working at Leon's

...Well somebody must have told Bush that they have really good custard, and they do, so the Presidential motorcade pulls into to Leon's for a couple of cones ..

(Hey! I am really not making this up!)

.. and Prez Bush has a photo- op with Max's friend Rachael, buys a big cone for $1.75.....AND WAITS FOR THE QUARTER CHANGE!

Well.... I guess he needed the spare change for the war or something..... rather than a tip for a poor High School Student. Cheap son-of-a-bitch!

But here's the real deal.....

Dear President Obama

Would you please write a note to my boss telling her that I need to leave work early today?

okjimm

WAR!

OKEE DOKE! I was really, really, really bored on the way to work this morning. A twenty minute commute is a long time for someone with ADD and my fertile mind was restless and I really was thinking of bananas and wondering what I would have for lunch and what I would do after the twenty minute commute back home and, gees, what ever happened to Nancy, the really, really cute girl I had a mega crush on in High School and what kind of beer she would like to drink and if she would still talk to me and if someone would already have made coffee at the office by the time I got there and why people don't like run-on sentences.

So, I decided to to get a band of gorillas together and start a war......

Ha! How's that for a casual link! Actually, not those kind of gorillas....

but this kind.... guerrillas..... the ones that just reek of justice and rights and freedom and liberty and unwashed clothes! Real Patriots!!!!! Men who would gladly enlist in a real war against...... say...... certain green vegetables like broccoli and asparagus ( both really vile green things if you ask me)

Yesirree Bob&Stuff! Get me a crew of some real bush-whackers to root out evil, inadequate manners and bad taste! Fight litter-bugs! Kill assholes who throw chewing gum on sidewalks! Eradicate dandruff! Battle Hemorrhoids!

Yuppers! I wanna assemble a rabble of guerillas that will rip & snort and battle the enemy ..

(whoever that may be on any given day.... cause I figger that If I Really wanna be a guerrilla leader I have to be ready to fight anyone at anytime for any reason...... or even for no reason at all!)

..and still be able to hang around a good old campfire at night and drink beer and eat sardines out of k-ration tins and sing battle songs and wax eloquent about all the innocent bystanders and innocent other we may have snuffed during the day! Shit&Whiskers! I wanna kill, maim, pillage, loot, rape, rampage, annihilate, commit a little genocide, hate, burn..........................

hey.. that is starting to sound like work!

.... and I know that work sucks.... and I would much rather suck beer...... hmmmmmm.... lemmee re-think this!

ok. never mind. I think I like Susan's idea.....http://phantsythat.blogspot.com/

I'm mailing $5 to Oblio's in Oshkosh so you can have a beer on me.

I think it is a marvelous idea!

Oblios Lounge

434 N Main St

Oshkosh, WI 54901

c/o Grill Dog's beer fund.

After all there are Cheeseheads here that go to bed sober..... I don't want to be one of them!