Jumat, 31 Desember 2010

Happy Un-New Year

Boy&Howdy....... it sure has been a fun year!!!! Yesirree Bob!  I like 2010 so much that I would like to recycle it, maybe turn it into kitty litter, or new plastic bottles or reform it as a new playground  or pave roads with it.... Hey, I had so much goddam fun in 2010... Shit&Whiskers!!!!  I LOVED IT!!!!
The news was really really cool.......
of course most of it was just made up..... except for every goddam little thing that Sarah Palin said.... all that shit was the honest to gosh truth.  No shit.... I went and fact checked every fucking thing she has said since she lost the election for the Repubs..... and it is ALL ttruthy..... you CAN see Russia from her backyard..... with a good satellite dish.
.... and everything Glenn Beck told he is true....abso-fucking -lutely....... Why would that guy lie?  Gees.... you just have to look him in the eye and realize that there is not a hint of dishonesty in his heart.  Really Really Riley!  Hey.... it was a Great year for Jesus, too, not that he really gives a shit...... Seriously...... I just saw him last night.... yea, I DID!  I mean, the really really real Jesus.....Hey, it was really cool in a really cool way.... see, it was just me and Jesus and Jerry Garcia & the Devil playing Monopoly last night...oh, and let me tell you... whatever they say about Satan&stuff...the dude has some really kick ass smoke!....but anyways... there we were and Jesus told me, .... straight up... he doesn't give a shit about Earth....Nope....he's planning a whole new Galaxy, he said, and is gonnas make it look just like Disney World.  That Jesus, whatta card! And he cheats at Monopoly, too!  I called the sucker on it and you know what he said?  Really Really!  He goes, "Fuck you jimm, I'm God, see.. & I can do whatever I Goddam well please!" Well he had me there.
Anyways.......Where was I?  Oh... talking news.....aw, shit
I doan wanna talk about the news anymore..... It's just all so fair and balance, see, Fox tells me so,  that I wanna puke.  & you betcha Betty after what I ate last nigh, OHHH....nobody wants to see that.  I started with just some popcorn.... and moved right on to some very good chick&garlic pizza.... and then Jesus, remember him?... has these really rreally good brownies and we scarfed a bunch of those and the Devil brought cake....wowsers.... really really good,,,,, they don't call it Devil's food for nothing.... Damn.... and then Jerry Garcia had some ice cream, said someone named some after him, go figure, and then we had some Oreos and cold milk, that was strictly my idea, c,mon I do have a few good ones once in awhile....really I do.  But anyways, where was I?  Oh, News




....oh yea.... right before I fell asleep I thought I saw a headline about Peace and the Worl.  Now I doan know where in the World Worl is........ but hot Shit&stuff...... in 2011 I am moving to the Worl.. iffen I can find it.  Maybe Jesus will tell me when he wakes up from his nap... boy was that guy stoned.





 Anyways.... I'm gonna go to Oblio's this afternoon and have a couple of beer with Joe, and Billy and Carl........  Billy is buying the free popcorn..... and tomorrow is a big old brand new WORL. peace&stuff







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