What should I get them... that happy couple, them!!!

OK.... as I have related elsewhere.... My invitation to Will and Kate's wedding bash was misplaced by the USPS.... but it did arrive... and lemmee tell you.... I am happier than a zombie in a Stephen King novel!!!   Whoa... I got out my best tie-died t-shirt and my old navy blazer... found a pair of jeans that does look all that bad, polished up the old tennie shoes, got a fairly clear Green Basy Packer cap.  Boy!!!  See, I gotz the bus ticket to Milwaukee, figure I take then take the bus to Chicago and well, gosh, from there I will figure something out.

But, see, the thing that is really bothering me is what should I get them?  I had a really nifty toaster all picked out....

but then,,,, saw so many others.... that I just couldn't make up my mind

Like... what if they already had one..... or maybe someone with the same kinda tastes like me would get them the same kind.... or what if the one I got did not run on the same current as theyz gotz in Britland, ... see it was tough.... cause iffen I were to get married again, gees, I sure would like a new toaster.  I think mine is from 1963 or something maybe a '65.

England swings like a pendulum do,
Bobbies on bicycles, two by two,
Westminster Abbey the tower of Big Ben,
The rosy red cheeks of the little children

..... gees, there are so many TOASTERS... and I have so little bread.  I like the model that is also a radio.... boy&howdy, I have seen some spiffy stuff in my day, but that would be the stuff!!  Yessirree Bob... I sure would want a toaster that would sing with me!!


OR..... I could get .......them...................................................................................

A BLENDER>>> Shit&Whiskers!!! every-o-body can use a new blender.... I mean when you have a whole house full of Royalish people and see, you wanna make mararitaz or whatever.... you need a good blender!! YUPPERZ.. A NICE BLENDER

Sams Club has an in store deal going on for this gas-powered blender that is certain to make short work of mixing any drink you can come up with. The blender is powered by a 43cc 2-stroke gas engine mounted on a stand with a stainless steel blender cup and a variable speed throttle to get just the right amount of blending for your drinks. It’s even decorated with diamond-plated accents to give it that classy-tool look. If you can find a store that has them in stock you can walk out with one for about $100.

.... or maybe a neato underwear dispenser?  Hmmmmm.... I mean, (blush blush wink wink) Newly-type-Weds are always needing clean underwear.... what with all the (blush wink blush wink... wink-a-blush&stuff)






Or a new set of glasses.... something swany and posh and classy.... not that the Britishes are class conscious....nope... not with all them there Dukes and Earls and Dukes of Earls and shit&stuff they have moore princes than you can shake a frog at!!!!  But they are an equal opportuniy type nation meaning they are just as likely to get into some fucked-u[ situation as their Americoid cousings.  Always one of the nicest thing about them Englanders.... they love a good colonial war as well as the next guy.

......Course.... could just get them a cat. 












Well anywayz, I am excited as all get out..... and I am sooooooo glad that I am getting 24/7 coverage of this wedding.... see, cause I figure there are about 6,000 Americans.... that will never be married